This week is my first marriage anniversary! Yay! It got me thinking about a common question people ask me: how do you travel so often without your partner? While my husband and I do travel together sometimes, I usually travel abroad solo. Here’s how I travel solo while in a relationship, and how we make it work for us!
*I am NOT a therapist or relationship expert by any means. This is just my experience in my own romantic relationship
Communication is Key
Open and honest communication is the key to any kind of extended separation, and especially if you travel solo while in a relationship. Be honest about how you feel while you are away or your partner is traveling without you. For example, my husband has asked me to stop sending him so many pictures on trips I took without him because they made him feel sad and more lonely. Instead, I share my favorite photo of the day and show him everything else once I get back home. Remember it’s ok to express feelings such as sadness, loneliness, and even jealousy. However, it is NOT ok to blame your partner for these feelings.
We love traveling together too!
Another important thing to communicate is your general location and if you will be doing anything remotely dangerous that day. If you decide to fly from Spain to Thailand without telling your partner where you are, it can cause some confusion and unnecessary worry. You don’t have to talk to them every second of every day, but they should be aware of big changes in your trip!
Schedule Call Times
If you’re on opposite sides of the planet, make sure you are taking the time difference into consideration. Schedule a time every day (or every few days) you are both available to chat and catch up. By scheduling times, your partner will feel more included in your week and you won’t be stapled to your phone throughout the day checking for texts and calls. If you don’t have a great international phone service, this can also be a way to save money by limiting calls or getting somewhere with good wifi to lower the cost.
T-Mobile’s International Plan is my favorite, and very affordable!
Ask About Them!
Whether you’re the one traveling or the one at home, be sure to ask your partner about their day or week during your scheduled phone call. The person traveling might be hesitant to bring up something exciting they experienced because they don’t want to make the other jealous, or the person at home may not want to bring up something they feel is boring compared to what their partner may be experiencing. Invite them to tell you!
I realized early on that I was not asking my partner at home about his day and instead blabbed on and on about how much fun I was having. This made him feel really left out, and his experiences at home without me insignificant. Once I started simply asking him what he was doing and how he was, communication immediately opened up and we were both much happier!
Remember to Have Money Handy for an Emergency Trip Home
Emergencies happen, and you need to be able to return home if your partner needs you. Keeping money saved throughout my trip for a last-minute flight home keeps us both feeling much less anxious about being apart, just in case something serious were to happen. I’ve never had to use that money *knock on wood*, but I always have it just in case.
Respect Their Wishes and Concerns
Part of keeping open communication is really listening to your partner’s wishes or concerns about your trip and respecting them. For example, back in 2018 when my friends abandoned me in Barcelona, I was wanting to head to our next destination solo: Morocco. However, my partner was extremely anxious about me not only traveling solo, but traveling solo to Morocco. I listened to his concerns, and we compromised. I would travel solo, but not to Morocco. Instead, I explored the rest of Spain and Portugal and had an incredible time! We avoided an argument, and he felt much better about me completing my trip.
We even got engaged on the beach in the Galápagos Islands!
Every relationship is different, and traveling without your partner takes a great deal of trust and communication. My husband and I take trips together, but we both often travel solo too. It’s a great way to keep some individuality in your relationship and allow each other the space they need to do what they want. It’s honestly kept our relationship super strong!
Would you ever travel solo while in a relationship?
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I don’t think I’d ever travel solo without my husband for a few reasons: I’d feel bad spending that kind of money if he couldn’t join me and he’s my favorite traveling partner so I always have more fun with him around. I’m not a very independent person, and I married my best friend, so this may color things some.
Oh I absolutely love traveling with my husband and he’s my best friend in the whole world! However, we are both highly independent people and we have different travel styles. It’s nice to be able to travel exactly how I want, especially if it’s to a destination he isn’t super interested in. We have a list of destinations we will ONLY travel to with each other unless one of us got some kind of business opportunity there (my blogging, his illustration).